An anecdote about Mr. Gurdjieff was posted on Paulo Coelho's blog recently, recounting the story of a man at the Prieure whose personality constantly irritated and exasperated the other members of the community. When he left the group, everyone was happy and relieved. But to their chagrin, Gurdjieff brought him back and secretly paid him to stay. . .solely for the purpose of giving community members some extra incentive for work on themselves.Groups I've lived and worked with have had, at the very least, one or two incorrigible characters who could push your tolerance to the limit. They weren't being paid to hang around, but group leaders were aware of the dynamic and made an unspoken place for this "pebble in shoe" effect.
Sometimes you end up doing the job yourself, functioning by accident or design as a pebble in the shoe for someone else. Or someone serves as a pebble in the shoe for you. There's no getting around it in the elbow-to-elbow, Purgatorial atmosphere of a group that works together for the long term.
The result for anyone on the receiving end is simply little bits of reaction and suffering -- either the automatic kind, or suffering that is of use in linking up to work and awareness.
A friend of mine up in the little Rochester group takes it literally and puts a real pebble in her shoe from time to time. Talk about a sole to soul connection...
This business extends beyond working in spiritual groups. In life at the office, a situation stares me in the face. This morning I almost lost my cool at someone and realized the pebble of her behavior might turn into a boulder quickly if I don't get back to being collected and present. She's the kind of person Gurdjieff would have hired to spice up the atmosphere just when things were getting cozy-smooth.
An office friend said, "It's easy to be nice to nice people. With the ones you don't like, it's harder."
